Note from Phil: What follows is an outstanding post from my friend and insightful entrepreneur Jack Hayhow. I was first introduced to Jack when he sent me a copy of The Wisdom of the Flying Pig along with an actual flying pig! Since then, we’ve hung out in person and shared many e-mails and insights back and forth. This article was written just for you dear readers. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!

It’s Lonely at the Top, But It Doesn’t Have to Be

It was a beautiful autumn morning in Kansas City. When I wandered out to fetch the newspapers a little after 5 a.m., the air was crisp, and the stars were bright. I usually don’t get on my way quite this early, but this was a special day, the opening of a new Roasterie Café. The café didn’t officially open until 6 a.m., but several of us had slipped in a little early in support of the owners, our friends, Danny and Carla O’Neill.

There seems to be a special bond among successful business owners. Perhaps it’s the common experience, or the inevitable loneliness of ownership. Maybe it’s the fact that we all need a shoulder to lean on from time to time that binds us together. Whatever it is, for me, it’s one of the most satisfying and rewarding parts of my life. In times when it feels like running a business is just too hard, I draw strength from my business owner friends. When I don’t know what to do, they offer the benefit of their practical wisdom. And when I succeed, they are an integral part of the celebration.

In the process of writing Breaking Through the Barrier – What Companies That Grow Do Differently, I discovered what I consider to be a profound truth. Leaders who are successful at growing their businesses are quick to associate with other business owners. Put the owners of 10 rapidly growing businesses in a room and you’ll find that nine of them have strong, active relationships with a network of other business owners. But in a group of 10 owners whose businesses are struggling, you’re likely to find only one or two who have any kind of a significant peer support.

Successful leaders seem to have a visceral understanding that they need help. Time after time we’ve heard successful leaders talk about their quest for relationship and knowledge and understanding. Joe Lieberman, owner of the web development firm Spidertel expressed it well:

“Magic things happen when you put yourself out there, and you’re earnest, and you really want to learn. I took advantage of support wherever I could find it … I went around to places like the SBA and SCORE and community colleges and talked with counselors and teachers and people who are there to foster entrepreneurism …”

Joe started reaching out his very first day in business. Other owners come to embrace the need for connection a bit more slowly, with trepidation or even reticence. But time after time our research has shown us that if an owner remains isolated, if he refuses connect with other business owners, if he shuns outside help, he cripples his potential for growth. There are exceptions, of course, but these exceptions are rare.

Reaching out is hard. It takes time – time that we tell ourselves we just don’t have. And for many of us, it’s uncomfortable. But it’s one of the things that the owners of growing companies find a way to do.

About the author: Jack Hayhow is an entrepreneur, author and speaker (www.JackHayhow.com). His company, Opus, (www.opuskc.com) provides a variety of training, tools and techniques to help owners build their business.